He Say She Say: Can a man be forced to cheat?

Q: Can a man be forced to cheat?

By Sharlene Emmanuel 

He Says: Yes! Guys are simple. We just want a woman that will keep a nice home, be supportive of us, and make us feel like the man of the house.  When a woman is unappreciative of her man, he doesn’t feel valued. We as men have feelings the same as women, and when our woman doesn’t take care of those feelings, we tend to stray.

Another thing that forces a man to cheat is when his woman badgers him to death. Nothing will drive a man into the arms of another female faster than a nagging woman. If we come home and must constantly argue about little things or if we can’t get peace in our home, then we are forced to find that peace elsewhere.

She Says: No, a man can’t be forced to cheat unless he has a gun to his head! Ultimately, the man has free will to choose to cheat or not.  Any reason a man gives for cheating is just an excuse to do what he ultimately wanted to do in the first place.

We as women deal with so many pressures on a day to day between work, kids, partner, etc.  We don’t always feel valued or loved by our partners, and yes, sometimes we get frustrated with our situations.  However, this doesn’t make us want to cheat! Men that say his woman forced him to cheat doesn’t want to take responsibility for his actions, so he would rather blame his partner.  This is such an unfair double standard!

Sharlene Says:  This question doesn’t have a black or white answer, so in this case, I will say He and She are right. Relationships are hard! Just ask Beyoncé and Jay-Z.  For a relationship to stand the test of time, there will be periods of happiness, frustration, struggle, joy, success and sometimes failures.

In some instances, yes, a woman’s behavior toward her man can lead him to stray.  Now I say lead him not force him to stray.  In some instances when a man doesn’t feel supported, appreciated or respected by his woman, it becomes easy for him take interest in another woman that can give him the attention he wants.

The truth is, a man isn’t forced into a situation with another woman; he chooses to take that path versus dealing with the matters in his relationship that made him want to stray in the first place. The success of every relationship depends on a couple’s ability to communicate.  Partners need to express how they feel — the good, the bad and the ugly.

Everyone is responsible for teaching their partner how to treat them. Let them know early on what you expect and what your deal breakers are. There is never a good reason for cheating and that should never be a solution to fixing relationship problems. If a man feels undervalued, unappreciated or a lack of peace in his relationship, he should first think about whether he wants to be in the relationship rather than complicate his situation by cheating.

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